If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I am available for nakedness
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize