you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
