Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize