I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
