If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
