My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize
