This girl is more easily done than said...
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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