Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Cover your peen. We're going out.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
