Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Do vagina's smell?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
