People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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