Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
