Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
