Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Randomize
