Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
