I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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