It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize