dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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