I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
