i just google imaged poop.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
