This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
