spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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