Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
