Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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