Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
