kristin has been a bad kristin
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
