he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
