Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
