so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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