I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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