i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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