Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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