You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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