my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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