you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
