They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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