I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize