love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize