a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
