You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
