get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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