What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
