would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
