I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
You can't special order awesome
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
