spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
