Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
