How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Operation Purity has been aborted
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
