check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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