okay pat passed out under dana's car
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
