just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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