Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
he had hair everywhere except his balls
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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