Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Randomize
